Here I Am Again

Hey everyone, I know it's been a while. I am back at my "fat weight" and I'm feeling pretty low lately. I've been going through a bunch of dental things (abscess, root canal, crown, wisdom teeth out)  this past month and I also moved in with my boyfriend at the end of June. Lots of changes and taking care of some things has made me put exercise on the back burner.

About a month ago I was trying on bathing suits, and started crying in the dressing room. I don't like feeling like this, not at all. I look at my body, my bone structure. I am meant to be petite. I am not meant to have flabby arms, a stomach, and back rolls. This is not who I am, or who I want to be. I feel like once people reach a certain weight, they become invisible. No more compliments coming my way like they were when I was 15lbs lighter on my journey...I feel disgusting. And I know, I shouldn't be so hard on myself, but honestly I talk and talk and talk about losing weight and getting healthy all the time but just keep gaining. Maybe this is my threshold...the final point where I decide enough is enough or give up. Well, I'm not giving up. I am never giving up. I just need to try much harder. Between my PCOS and the birth control they gave me, I have gained almost 10lbs since March. Once I am recovered from my wisdom teeth removal (had the surgery yesterday), I need to get back into good habits that will make me proud of myself again.

Please pray for me, and I hope that I can inspire others to start their new healthy lives and know that we are all human and make mistakes. I just need a helping hand right now. I have the love and support from my wonderful boyfriend, and I have some great friends who will help me as well...but I need to motivate myself and take a pledge for a healthier me, and commit to it. If anybody has a good program, tips, or words of encouragement please feel free to comment.

Love,

• Laura 

Sometimes I Just Hate People

Ok not really HATE, but I am astounded daily by the lack of compassion and kindness towards others. What is so wrong with being nice to your fellow man/woman? Today I had a bit of a loss in faith in humanity.
I was waiting for a prescription to be filled, so I took myself out for a quick coffee/lunch downtown at my favorite coffee shop. As I put coins in my meter where I parked, I heard a couple guys walking down the sidewalk in the opposite direction as me. I started walking and one of them said "She's cute...a little fat though." loud enough for me to hear. They both started laughing and his friend was like "A LITTLE!"

Needless to say, comments like that ruin peoples' days. I did nothing to harm them, did nothing to bother them, literally just walked by them and I had to hear that.

First of all, I'm fabulous. Secondly, they were rough looking too (messages etched by shaving them into your scalp are all the rage...if this is 1997), but you don't see me judging them. Thirdly, I know I'm better than them in so many ways because I would NEVER just say that to somebody.

It made me also realize that sometimes I do judge people by the way they look at times, and it is something I am totally working on. Everybody has their own struggles, stories, life...and you never know what somebody is going through. I think I might start complimenting people for things that I like about them, strangers and friends alike...because just as harsh words go a long way, kind words go further. I can't believe the hatred in this world. Ugh. Let's combat the hate with some love <3

-Laura

PCOS and Progress

Hey guys!
Well, I decided back in mid-January to get a check-up by my doctor because I haven't been to a doctor in a few years. My boyfriend had some health issues and he would have never found them without a checkup, so he pushed for me to get myself checked as well...so I did. I have been to the doctor seven times, had so many vials of blood taken, so many tests...even ultrasounds to figure out what was wrong with me (since I have such difficulty losing my weight, and have super thing hair...etc)...I am pretty low on my B12 vitamin so I have to take that...but I also found out I have PCOS (Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome). So now...I just need to deal with that, and watch my nutrition and exercise as much as I can. I'm happy I have some sort of reason why I hit plateaus so easily, and why I am bigger than all of my other siblings by at least 40lbs, when I follow a stricter diet and exercise plan. Ugh. Now, this is a reason for all of that...but not an excuse. I will use my diagnosis as more motivation to work harder.

In better news...I have atlete-level cholesterol, so I feel pretty rockin about that! :)

My workload is going to change a little now that we have a new bartender to take some of the extra hours I have been working. I am going to work on making things at home and bringing them to work with me.

In other news, I am at 144lbs again, so I've lost 6lbs since my last depressing post. Also, I gave up Red Bull (even the sugar free kind!) back in January, and I feel a lot better. I used to drink 2-3 per day, just to keep my eyes open during the day. Now that I'm taking B12 supplements, I am a lot more alert than I was. Also...this month I am giving up drinking (except for an occasional glass of wine), and fried foods. I also recently purchased a juicer!!! I'm going to have so much fun with that thing!

I appreciate the support from my viewers. This blog will return to a more motivating, uplifting blog very shortly. Here is a small bit of confidence boost for me though ~ This picture is my first big progress photo, the photo on the right and bottom left are from last summer, about 9 months ago. The top left picture is me about a month ago. I can see the changes, which makes me feel a ton better. Thank you guys!

I'll talk again soon, promise <3
-Laura

New Year, Fresh Start.

Hey guys! I've totally flaked on this blog, I've been working 50 hours a week and all of my free time has gone to visiting my boyfriend (We're doing the long distance thing). So I'm very sorry!

The cleanse: It was very hard, but I did it. I didn't cheat at all, but it was very difficult. The first, second, and third day were the hardest, and i felt very weak. All in all, I lost 9lbs, but gained it back because I didn't stick with it.

I'll be honest...I work in a restaurant as a bartender right now, and I've been working overtime for the past 3 months so most of my meals have been from my job. I gained back all of my weight, and I don't feel good about it. So...I'm back to 150lbs, and I feel so terrible about it. All of my progress I've made...I mean, people usually gain around the holidays and stuff but I am just really upset with myself. It crept back little by little and so now...I have to make more goals (which I don't mind).

I did join a gym here a month ago, and they have this amazing program there called ActivTrax. You start with a strength test to give the program a starting point, but then it prints out a workout for you to do each time you go! It tells you what machines to use, how much weight, how many sets, and how many reps...it really is awesome and has changed my life! The gym I joined is wonderful and locally owned, which I am very happy about.

My 2014 Goals:
Gym 3-5x/week
Focus on my nutrition
Don't cheat until cheat day!
Organize my life better
Keep motivated!!!

My confidence is pretty low right now because of my setback, but I know that I will overcome this and I will TOTALLY be in a bikini this summer!!!

Thanks for reading, sorry it has been a while again...my next post will be more positive, I promise :)

-Laura

My Plateau Cleanse

Hey guys!
I am still at this plateau, and it sucks. In fact, I'm beginning to gain back some of the weight I have been working so hard to lose. So, I am starting a cleanse diet for this next week. You can supposedly lose 10-20lbs during this week, if you do the diet correctly. I'm going to share the details of this diet for you, in case you want to do the cleanse as well! A note: this is a SAFE diet full of eating nutrient-rich foods, NOT starving yourself. It can be done as much as once per month, and people have used this for decades. My friend who just did this said she was given the details of this by her doctor, and I searched and found it on the myfitnesspal.com website. Anyhoo, enjoy! I'll be posting my results once I am done with this :)

Step One: The Soup

A large part of this diet is eating a soup that you make at the beginning of the week to eat the rest of the week. Here is the recipe:
6 Large Onions
2 Green Peppers
4 Whole tomatoes (fresh or canned)
1 Head of Cabbage
1 Large Stalk of Celery
Any other veggies you'd like could go in there, I am probably going to add garlic and carrots
Season W/ Dry Onion Soup Mix
Water

Chop up all the veggies, put in a large pot with water and seasoning, boil for ten minutes and then simmer until veggies are nice and soft. Put away until needed thru the week.

Step Two: The Diet

Each day of this diet you do something different, and it must be followed correctly.

Day One: The Flush
On this day, you may eat only fruit. I am choosing watermelon and cantaloupe, because they are low calorie and full of water and detoxifying ingredients.  You may NOT eat bananas, save that for later on this week (you'll see why!). Make sure to drink at the very least 8 cups of water. You may also have a bit of the soup today. This day is meant to flush out all of the toxins and get you ready for the week ahead.

Day Two: The Flush (Part II)
On this day, eat only vegetables. These vegetables can be steamed, cooked, or raw. You may not eat corn, peas, and beans as they are higher in calories and you want to lower your calorie intake right now. You MAY have one baked potato in the morning, with just a small dash of salt and butter. Enjoy that potato, because the rest of your day will be leafy greens and low calories. You may also have some of the soup today. Your body will get used to no fat/calories/starches. You will start to notice the weight loss. Remember 8 cups of water!

Day Three: Make It or Break It Day
Combine the previous two days, but no potato. Fruits and vegetables all day, plus the soup. This day will be harder than the last two because you aren't used to this fruit/veggie rich diet and you'll probably have cravings. FIGHT THEM! You got this, and you'll be so proud of yourself once you get past this day. Again, don't forget all the water!

Day Four: Bananas!!!
On this wonderful day, you get to eat as many as 8 bananas! You also get to drink 8 glasses of skim milk. You may also have the soup and water. You can make a banana/milk smoothie, mash up the bananas and eat them like that, or just eat them whole! This will help your sweet tooth cravings.

Day Five: Beef and Veggies (I know, right?)
You can have 10 to 20 ounces of lean beef and six tomatoes on your fifth day. Try to drink at least 8 glasses of water in order to wash away any uric acid in your body. You may also have the soup today. Enjoy your steak!

Day Six: Beef and Veggies (Part II)
Same as yesterday, eat until your heart is content with lean beef and veggies plus the soup. Lots of water is key on this. :)

Day Seven: The Final Day (YOU DID IT!!!)
Today you get to eat brown rice, veggies, unsweetened fruit juice, and finish off that soup (I am sure you just love that soup by now! haha). Don't forget the water, and give yourself a pat on the back. Be proud of yourself!


I'm starting this cleanse tomorrow and I'm a little nervous for a few reasons:

1) I hope I can do it, and not disappoint myself. Sometimes I have trouble committing to certain things.
2) I also have to go to work during this and I don't want to rush to the bathroom to pee because of all the water and water-rich foods I am going to be eating.
3) What if this doesn't actually help my plateau?

I wish everyone the best luck on this, let me know your results!!!

-Laura

My Confidence Boost

Hey guys, it's been a while! I've been so busy between moving a month and a half ago, working full time, and juggling my newly long distance relationship...but I missed posting on here and I finally found a reason to!

I've been stepping on the scale every single day and my weight won't go below 140...it fluctuates between 140-143, no matter HOW diligent I am with my meals every day. I have stayed on a strict 1200 calorie diet (I eat whatever I want, but limit myself to 1200...I can either eat one shitty meal or a few healthy ones...which choice do you think I make? Healthy, of course!), and I have felt pretty down on myself because I feel like I've hit a brick wall and can't get through it.

I went home about a week ago, and people I haven't seen in months have told me that I look great, ask me if I've been losing weight, and calling me "skinny" ... maybe the scale doesn't matter as much as I thought? I know I have a long way to go still, because I am still not happy with the way I look (though I noticed some changes myself) . . . but coming home and having everyone praise my accomplishments was exactly what my soul needed. It motivated me to keep going, to not give up, and to work even harder. I am going to try to exercise a lot more, because I think that will be the thing to get me over my "hump" haha.

Sometimes, all you need is a few kind words to fuel your goals' fire. :) Thank you! <3

A Few Must-Have Apps (that are FREE!)

Hey guys! I know it's been a while since I posted in here, but I've been very busy with my school and work. I kind of lost sight of my goals during the past few months, but these last few weeks I have kicked it up big time...and even brought technology into the mix! The apps I'm going to tell you about today are very handy tools that make weight loss a breeze!

Lose It! (Android and iPhone)

This app is my main app that I use. It gives you a budget on how many calories you have each day based on your height, weight, gender, age, and goals. I'm allowed 1291 calories per day and I have been under every day on my calories. You can track your food, exercise, weight, etc. and it keeps a detailed record for you. Without this app, I would honestly be lost!!! 

RunKeeper

This app uses GPS technology to track your runs, walks, hikes, bike ride, etc. and at the end tells you how fast you went, how far you went, how long it took you, and how many calories burned. It is a great tool to use in conjunction with Lose It, and I use this app any time I run. It also tells you when you beat an old record, which is awesome for motivation! Another thing...it reminds you to work out when you haven't in a couple days, which is awesome. 

Daily Workouts

This app is great for a short workout. You choose your target area that you'd like to work out, the length of workout, and how many times you'd like the workout repeated. It's perfect for busy people like me, and there's even video to go with it that shows you how to do it and how long that particular move lasts. 

 

I hope these three apps help you like they've helped me. I have lost two pounds this week just by being diligent and motivated, and I can't wait until I reach my goal weight! Happy journey, everyone.